Do you make a New Year’s Resolution? If no, is it because you don’t ever keep them? Well, I have some New Year’s resolutions that you can accomplish. You see I believe in setting goals that I won’t fail at. For example…

  • Lose one pound and keep it off. It sounds small but most people gain a pound a year. If I do this every year I’ll lose seven pounds by the time I’m 40.
  • Go to the gym one time. People like to set lofty goals like “go to the gym every day.” That’s great but if you set a New Year’s resolution to only go to the gym once you will feel oh so great about yourself every time you go because you are destroying your goal.
  • Not poop my pants. Now that’s a resolution I hope I never break.
  • Brush my teeth twice a day and floss 2 weeks before my dentist appointment. I don’t have a problem brushing every day, but I stink at making time to floss.  I figure that if I can floss two weeks before I go to the dentist they will not tell me that I need to floss more. I’ve never had a cavity but they always reprimand me for my lack of flossing.
  • Not eat a single Twinkie. I haven’t had a Twinkie in probably ten years. I figure that if I eat one in 2012 my life is going in the wrong direction.
  • Think about doing some sit ups.
  • Avoid movies with sparkling vampires.
  • Read a book a month. Now that I have kids I read children’s books on a weekly basis. One book a month will be nothing. Those jokers are only a few pages longs. Heh heh heh.
  • Watch more TV. Not a lot more, but I’d like to watch more NBA basketball than I did last year.
  • Go to bed every night.
  • See a lot of superhero movies. Including The Dark Knight Rises, The Avengers, and the new Spiderman. The jury is still out on whether or not I’ll go see Ghost Rider.
  • Learn another language. It’s not that hard. you just have to pick the right language. I’m fluent in American, “yo, what up?” I’m also fluent in Australian, “G’day, mate.” And I’m learning English, “hello guvnor.” Did you know that Randy is not a good name in England? I think it means naughty.

Now listen, you only have 3 days to finalize your resolutions. Think it through. Plan ahead. Aim low and you can be one of the few that keeps your New Years Resolutions. Or…

You can set a realistic goal and come up with a plan on how you are going to keep it. I am thinking about running a half marathon in 2012. It won’t be easy but I plan on running it with friends. We will see if I can keep this goal.

Do you have a New Year’s Resolution?