Three years ago I started this blog and each year I have featured a post entitled Awesomely Bad Movies. To check out year one click here. Year two click here. And finally year three click here.
Awesomely Bad Movie = a movie that you love but when you show it your friends they are like, “do what?” It’s a movie that you could watch over and over but your spouse wants to burn. It’s a movie that when you tell people it’s good they question all the choices you have ever made in this life. It’s hard to admit that a film that you like is Awesomely Bad, but we all have them.
This year I decided to step things up and let some wicked awesome blogging supper ninjas step up to the plate and pitch their Awesomely Bad movie. Here’s where you come in. Read each post, check out the authors blog, and then vote at the bottom for the most Awesomely Bad movie from the list. Voting ends at midnight tonight. Let the fun begin…
Rat Race – pitched by Ricky Anderson
I love Rat Race.
It’s a loose remake of It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, which I grew up watching.
Both are gems.
I laughed so hard in the theater the first time I saw it that I couldn’t sit up straight.
My wife and her friend were chatting and giving me strange looks, having given up on the film ten minutes after the opening credits. John Cleese, Seth Green and Rowan Atkinson steal the show. I own this movie, but nobody is ever willing to watch it with me. I guess that makes it Awesomely Bad.
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Weekend At Bernie’s – pitched by Matt Cannon
Do you remember the episode of Friends where Joey reveals a secret concerning Rachel’s favorite movie? You probably don’t, but I do. This is mainly because I am a nerd whose social life resembled that of a Franciscan Monk for much of the show’s run.
In the episode, Rachel claims that her favorite movie is Dangerous Liaisons, but Joey reveals the truth: her favorite movie is really Weekend at Bernie’s. This marked the 2nd thing that Rachel and I had in common. The first? We both made certain hairstyles popular—she had “The Rachel” featured at salons everywhere and I had “The Big Ugly” featured at Rocky Top Barber Shop.
Rachel was embarrassed by her love for the most awesomely bad movie of all time. Maybe you are, too.
Maybe you don’t want to admit that you view the combination of Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman as the comedic equivalent of pimento loaf and cheese. Maybe you don’t want anyone to know that you believed Terry Kiser’s ability to literally play dead should have garnered him an Oscar. Or that after seeing his performance you and your cousin tried to replicate his mannerisms for the rest of the summer.
It’s possible that you were never a nerd or that you have since moved way past your nerdy stage. If so—congratulations! I’m happy for you. In fact, I may even join you someday. But if I do, I hope to never forget that during the summer of 1989 I first watched a movie that made me want to spend a weekend at the beach with my best friend and a dead guy.
It’s good to have a goal; Weekend at Bernie’s gave me one. That is why it gets my vote as the most awesomely bad movie of all time.
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Clean Slate – pitched by Clay Morgan
Clean Slate is one of the funniest comedies from the 90s. Many people don’t remember the Dana Carvey laugher which is ironic since his character suffers from a form of amnesia that causes him to lose his memory every morning. Siskel called it dismal, but what does he know. Ebert liked it. Even Siskel admitted that the eye-patch dog with depth perception issues was funny.
Another memorable scene takes place when Carvey runs on stage during a chase and is thrust into the role of keynote speaker. Pointer in hand he “describes” his recent archaeological dig by retracing the team’s steps. I’ve mimicked that scene many times in my classrooms and no one ever gets it. And the courtroom scene is hilarious!
The cast is no joke with Kevin Pollak and James Earl Jones in supporting roles, not to mention Valeria Golino who I may have been mildly obsessed with during high school. To this day I can’t even speak to women who are half Italian-half Greek for fear of being melted by their accent. Yeah, Dana Carvey totally rocked the 90s.
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Kung Pow – pitched by Tyler Tarver
Kung Pow (2002): Enter the Fist is the greatest worst movie ever for the sole reason it is not bad at all. It is a plethora of comedic genius with a dash of charm and action with a clump of awesome.
It tells the story of a Chosen One, who is hunted all his life because he has been given a gift of being unparalleled in his martial arts ability. Action? Why yes, it has that too.
How was he marked? Tonguey, a little face that can talk that is located on his tongue, obviously. Comedic gold, yeah, we’ve struck it.
The thing that made this movie over the top like Stallone was the numerous amount of reusable situational catchphrases. My entire senior year of high school was comprised of nothing but these. English? Nah, Kung Powenese.
If I had a dollar for every time my friends and I would see each other at the end of the hall and yell “CHOSEN ONE” and the other’d respond “I’M COMING!”, I’d only have around 47 dollars, but if I would’ve invested in Apple then, it’d be worth quite a bit.
Evil Betty? Can you think of a better full movie joke lead in to the introduction of a final fight sequence to the turn of Black Betty? No, I didn’t think so scrub, you’re just a guy who thinks he’s fine oh no.
This movie can not be bad because it is good. Logic? Yes, and fact. If you can sit through this whole movie and never laugh then don’t bother coming over to my house in the morning ever for French toast and scrambled eggs and bacon.
The only reason people might think it’s bad is because of the CGI cow fight sequence, a CGI can make or break a film, luckily this film was too great to be broken, like the unbreakable Egg, or like, something that’s not an egg.
So, I have one final thing to say to all you who want to make a mission of tearing down the epic masterpiece of humor and art and wonder and comedy and art: “You’ll never make it. Never make it. Never make it. Never make it, never. Don’t you see you can’t make it?”
Three tough choices. I have only seen snippets of W.A.B.'s but have never seen or heard of the other two. It's a tough choice, so I'm gonna have to buy a vowel Pat. Let's see, how about an 'F'?
I love Rat Race!! Oh, and your poll on the side bar is clearly flawed… Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 comes out July 15th (supposedly)! Anyway, since I don't have that choice, I'll have to vote for Pirates of the Caribbean.
Anyway, I enjoyed reading your other lists (years 1, 2, and 3) and will have to check out some of these Awesomely Bad Movies. Oh, Napoleon Dynamite, anyone?? 🙂
In good conscience, not sure I can vote, as the most wickedly awesome bad movie of all time is nowhere to be found above. You know the one I'm talking about: Cabin Boy, starring Chris Elliott.
I'm giving out virtual fist bumps to anybody who votes for Weekend at Bernie's. You sure that you don't want to change your mind?
To show you my vote and how bad I think they are: I have never seen any of them and have only heard of Weekend at Bernies. So all three have my vote but since matt bribed us I will say Weekend at Bernies.
Attaboy–*fist bump*
totally missed clean slate…may have to check it out…come on weekend at bernies hands down…
Yes! I've finally made it to the immortal League of Supper Ninjas! You should see me tuck into a pizza. It's like a magic trick – where'd it go?!?
And Clay, we've gotta stop meeting this way…
Thanks for the invitation. Free virtual fist bump to everyone who votes for Weekend at Bernie's.
Rat Race was funny in the day…. but Weekend at Bernies is classic!
Dustin, thanks for stopping by. It's going to be a battle.
Matt, thank you for being awesome!
Ricky, I am looking forward to seeing that one day…unless it means you will have to kill me because of some super ninja code.
Thanks Brian. Have you seen Rat Race?
Billy, you are a great comment leaver and very faithful over at the seeking pastor. Thanks for stopping by!
For the sake of a VFB (virtual fist bump), I voted for WAB.
Go team Matt!
Yes! *fist bump*
Wow Chad. Next year I just might have to include you in this little challenge. That movie is aweful, but if you like that's what makes it awesomely bad.
Elyse, it is flawed. I didn't catch it until my wife pointed it out. I tried to change it but they won't let me. Sorry bout that.
Daniel, I added a fourth challenger. He was a little late getting his write up to me. Have you heard of Kung Pow?
I'm voting for Rat Race because it has Breckin Meyer in it and this may be the only chance he has to be associated with a winning movie. And I think that guy needs it.
Boo for compassion.
C'mon MattScott. Breckin NEEDS this.
I like that you carried over the MattScott from your blog shout out. That's quality comment leaving.
I loved Kung Pow!
"Taco Bell, Taco Bell, product placement for Taco Bell!"
I almost went for this one and then was afraid no one else would have heard of it, so I went with Rat Race.
Good pickins, Tyler.
I would be honored, sir!
Sorry–that was the Scott coming out of me. He can be a real jerk.
Yeah I remember the last one through its ads on T.V.. Never saw it though. This looks like a real qualifier for this list.
That was an easy choice. Weekend at Bernies of course…
Wooo–#firstbump
Haven't seen any of them. But, Matt sent me here. So, weekend at Bernie's it is. 🙂
Yes! #fistbump!
Im upping the stakes, Virtual French kiss to anyone who votes for Kung Pow.
Wow. I don't know how to change my vote but I'm tempted.
Sorry. Can't vote. I walk out of bad movies and meet my husband later. Or I did before we had twins. That was in that period where we went to movies.
Tough decision between Rat Race and Weekend at Bernies. Both are so awesomely bad! Had to give it to Rat Race, though, because I find myself quoting it more often.
Gotta be Rat Race. It's the one I quote most often.
No virtual fistbump for you!
Sorry about that, Matt. Nothing personal, honest!
Thanks, Larry. Are you familiar with Five Iron Frenzy?
"I still like Larry, I still like Larry, I still like Laaaaaaarrrrrryyyyy!"
I knew of Five Iron Frenzy but, believe it or not, had not heard "I still like Larry" until today. Pretty cool. Thanks for mentioning it, Ricky!
Out of these choices, I had to pick Rat Race. W.A.B is totally a classic, and I do love that movie, but I actually *like* Rat Race better. However, my personal choice for the MOST awesomely bad movie ever is Buffy The Vampire Slayer (pre-SMG and the WB) with Kristy Swanson, Luke Perry, and David Arquette.
Lindsey, Buff is Awesomely Bad. Monica loves that movie.