Do you want to be awesome? Sure, we all do. If you want to be certifiably awesome then all you have to do is follow these five steps.
- Buy trendy clothes so that people will like you before they get to know your personality. Right now that means buy colored jeans. Like red. I tried to buy red jeans but they are only made for skinny people. I’d have to go down four sizes to fit into the skinny red pants that I was looking at.
- Lose weight. Truly awesome people are skinny. After all they don’t sell tight skinny red pants at the Big & Tall store.
- Only say trendy words. If you still say “whoomp there it is” you probably need lessons on being awesome. To obtain an awesome vocabulary watch a lot of E on cable, listen to rap, and avoid saying anything that was trendy when you were in high school.
- Find awesome people and become their best friend. If they won’t be your best friend don’t take no for an answer. You will become awesome by association whether they like it or not.
- Talk a lot about how awesome you are. Nobodies perfect. That’s true, but nobody needs to know about your flaws. If you talk about how awesome you are on a regular basis it will magnify your awesomeness and overshadow you imperfections.
With these 5 steps you too can be awesome!
Or you can find your identity in Jesus and boast in your weakness. Do what?
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. – 2 Corinthians 12:9
It’s exhausting to try and make people think you are awesome. On the other hand it’s freeing to find your identity in Jesus and to boast in your weakness.
I can’t fit into tight skinny red pants, when I hear that swag is the new word of choice for awesome people I can’t help but think of S.W.A.G. – stuff we all get, I have a sign on my forehead that says “if you are awesome run away”, and I can’t help but talk about my flaws.
A goal of my life is to be me. To be the me that God created me to be. I often forget this and try to please people. Thankfully awesome is as awesome does and I am found in Jesus. I don’t know if that sentence makes sense, but I am still found in Jesus and that’s wicked awesome.
What characteristics do you think make someone awesome?